Another girl! Baby #5 and 7 months later, I like to tell people that she's completely humbled me.
My pregnancy with Ralphie was really, really nice. Lots of exhaustion in the beginning. . . Taking naps daily while the big kids watched a show was the only way I could make it through the day. I'm talking 1-1.5 hour naps! I had some food aversions, a little bit of nausea, but nothing that couldn't be managed.
We did the blood test around 9 weeks and we found out we were having our third girl in a row! I was kind of shocked, but also knew it at the same time (I was drinking pickle juice). Jake told me that God knew if we had a boy on this pregnancy, we might be done.
I definitely felt more tired physically as I neared the end of pregnancy. I know that's probably obvious, but I just would like to remember how hard a 5th pregnancy was on my body. When I'm pregnant, I feel bad for the kids that I'm not as active and playful as I can be. At the same time, I recognize the blessings of pregnancy and adding siblings to our family.
A little girl was due January 9, 2027 and ended up joining us just one day late on January 10. She and Brynn are exactly 2.5 years apart to the day!
As I neared the end of pregnancy, we made it through all the big holidays: Thanksgiving in Georgia (a big drive at 36 weeks), Christmas, Wesley's birthday, New Year's Eve (all of the kids got the flu and were down for several days). I always have some quiet hope that I might go a little bit early, but I never do. My mom came in town to help us with the kids. I was taking walks with Joey every morning -- usually a mile at the least. I was sleeping pretty well, but by the end of each day my body felt completely done. My patience was being tested. Keeping the house clean was impossible. I was peeing alllllllllllllll the time during the day.
We had co-op for the kids on January 9. I took them and everyone asked when is that baby coming? I said, "Today is my due date!" I felt a little off the entire day and just kept trying to shake off that feeling because I wasn't actually feeling any contractions. The afternoon of the 9th, Jake wanted to take the kids to Stonelick Lake but I just felt like taking a rest. I really felt like I needed to gear up for this baby, and I was so right.
That evening I was having some contractions, I texted my friends and let them know. They tapered off and I went to sleep. Around 2:30 am, I woke up again to some contractions and decided to go into the living room. Jake woke up about an hour later because I was out of the bed and wanted to check on me. The contractions were so odd. A few would come every 5 minutes and be completely timeable. Others would be every 8 minutes, 5 minutes, 10 minutes. . . The intensity would change with each depending on the position I was in. I couldn't figure out when I wanted to go to the hospital. My mom was sleeping downstairs so we decided to just go and be there, but not go in.
We drove to the hospital and walked around the parking lot and sat in the car for about an hour before we decided to go in. When I was walking, they were very easy to track and manageable, but when were in the car they were sporadic and uneven again. It was also so cold! We drove through McDonalds to get some breakfast before deciding to go in. Jake thought it would be a good idea to go in and "lock in" with a dark, calm room and all the supportive people around me. I let Tracey, Abby, and Emily know that they could head over to the hospital soon.
In the triage room, I was really calm. I answered all of her questions and agreed to be checked. I was, I believe, 5 cm dilated. I told her things usually go fast once I get the laughing gas. On the phone with the other nurse, I could tell from how she was talking that she didn't really believe I was in active labor. I was also weirded out by how different the contractions were and that they weren't coming regularly at this point but I knew I should be there.
They got me into the room and set up on the bluetooth monitoring so I could walk around. Abby and Tracey showed up. We were all talking as I walked around. I was getting in my head a little bit so I decided to grab the peanut ball and start using the laughing gas. After laying with the peanut ball for a few minutes, I felt like my water began to leak and I asked to be checked. My nurse midwife came in and said I was 8 cm and things were progressing. At this point, I think I went through transition because I feel like I "came back" to the room after some intense contractions. My CNM said I could follow my body's lead on pushing or not. She ended up staying in the room with me the entire time.
I wasn't pushing quite yet, but my body was doing some of the ejection reflex and each time more water would leak out. After a few contractions like this (where they still weren't coming every 2 minutes or something time-able), I started to try to push with my body. I was excited for Jake to deliver the baby (what would have been his first time for us!) and my CNM was all for it sitting behind him letting him totally take over.
With Brynn and Eden, I pushed just a few times and they came out. I thought this would be the same. But 20 minutes went by and I was still pushing. Then 40 minutes. Then an hour. Tracey was supporting me and at one point, Jake took off his gloves and came up to my face to talk to me. I was a sweating, blubbering mess and I felt like something was very wrong. I kept asking, "Where is she?" In my head I just kept thinking something is wrong, she should be here by now, what are they not telling me? I was working the hardest I've ever worked.
My midwife said I had a little bit of a cervical lip (which I haven't had since June!!!) so I know now that the baby's positioning just wasn't ideal. She removed the lip for me as I pushed and that was diabolical. She also asked if I wanted my water broken and I thought it had already broken so I said yes, but as she was about to do it, it broke on its own. She also said that my cervix was swelling and requested that I stop bearing down and do small breaths instead of pushing. I did that for a few contractions until she was comfortable with me pushing again. I don't know the order of all how all these events went down, I just know they were somewhere in the middle of the pushing stage.
It felt like I had birthed the baby's head twice at this point. I kept feeling like, "OK! The hardest part is over!" And then the baby would go right back in. (She never actually came out, she just kept "turtling). Finally, after a lot of work, I was able to get her head out while I was on all 4s. It was a PUSH, PUSH, PUSH HARD yelling-at-me situation. I was screaming, "I CAN'T DO THIS!" And they were all saying, "You can! You have to! You are doing it!" After 25 or 30 seconds, my nurse flipped me over with Jake's help, pushed my legs up, and pushed on my stomach as I kept pushing. The baby came out with her hand right by her face. I heard them yell, "50 second shoulder dystocia". I hadn't fully processed what had happened because I was so focused on getting the baby out and getting through contractions.
I took a breather. Just laid my head back and cried and told Jake we can never do this again. He took a good second to cry. The baby cried. He cut the cord and then I got to hold her and all was right in the world. I was checked for tears - none. I needed a moment so they actually took the baby and weighed her and did all the things so I could recover for just a second. They were telling me how big she looked and asked how big I thought she was? I said maybe she's 9 lbs or something. And they said oh, definitely bigger. When they scale came up, they said, "10 lbs 2 oz!!" I was shocked to say the least. I've always been worried about getting into the 9 lb range, but we skipped right through that into the 10s and everything completely made sense. The timing of the contractions, the positioning of her head, the hand by her face, the length of pushing, the shoulder dystocia.
I felt absolutely destroyed. I was beyond exhausted, sore, and not feeling well. I rallied for all the visitors that came and that I wanted to meet baby, but when we went home, I was in our bed for the next 7 days. The longest I've ever stayed home with a newborn baby. Of course we went to her pediatrician appointment but that was it. I was soooo sooo exhausted. Emotional about how the birth went. I was incredibly sore on my abdomen. My legs were tired. I felt dirty. Nursing was difficult. The bleeding is another thing in itself -- changing baby's diapers but also changing my own. Small bladder so I was still waking up to use the restroom. All. Of. The. Things.
It's always so worth it. And it's just a season that goes by so quickly. You forget all these things and want to do it again in no time. But wow, her birth did take some mental and physical recovery.
And yes, I'd do it all again for the sweetest, most special little baby girl that everyone adores.
Ralphie Lynn Blackwelder
10 lbs 2 oz
