Fall family pictures + food poisoning

Olivia took our family pictures this Sunday and I LOVE how they turned out!! I was going for the fall feeling, but not TOO fall-y if that makes sense... Anyway, I LOVE them. June was so happy and I'm so grateful we got some pictures of her smiling!!

On our way up to squaw peak, I ate a bowl of chili that we had made the night before as we drove up. Haha well, I had left the chili out all night and I didn't even think about it at the time... but at about 2 am, I was feeling SO nauseous. I jumped out of bed and turned on the shower, hoping to escape the nausea, but it was too late and I started puking in the toilet. SO SICK. I hate throwing up.

When I finished I was like whew, okay, done. I went back to bed. Then at  5 am it happened again and I threw up even MORE. Oh my gosh I felt so sick. And I was kicking myself for eating the chili! The rest of the day, I mostly laid down on the bed or on the floor, sipping sprite and trying to eat as little as possible but enough to try and maintain my milk supply. Holy cow it is difficult trying to care for a baby when you're feeling so sick! I definitely had a look at what my life will be like next time we're pregnant . . . I can confidently say I'm glad it's just me and June for right now.

Of course Jake was begging me to take a pregnancy test hahahaha. I knew for sure I wasn't pregnant, but I appeased him and took a test anyway ... of course it was negative, but it was funny taking one again and waiting to see if there was a second line. I would've freaked if there was!

I'm feeling 100% today and went to school and went to the pumpkin patch and have had a great day. I'm so glad that food just got out of my body as quick as possible. We are all hoping for a healthy winter, escaping the flu and food poisoning!!

mushy mom thoughts

Today I watched my friend give birth to her beautiful 7 pound boy and my heart was just shattered into pieces. She worked so hard to get that sweet baby here with us, and he is already so perfect. Watching him come out, slowly but surely with help from the doctor, I cried. There truly is nothing that compares to a baby being born.

As I watched them clean him, weigh him, check his heart, I couldn't stop thinking about June. This was someone's son, and she is my daughter. I tried to remember these moments when I had her. I can hardly remember now if I was worried about her breathing and crying. It seems so distant, yet also feels like it was just yesterday.  I was wondering what she was doing with Jake. Did she miss me? Because holy cow, in that moment, I missed her so bad.

Oh my baby is sweet. She's also a little fireball. She's 7 months old now and when you take something away from her, she'll cry and cry until you give it back. Her personality is growing. My favorite thing is that she really loves her parents. My friend Jackie was watching her yesterday and said when Jake came to get June, she had the biggest smile on her face when she saw him.

Ahhh... My first baby. So many firsts with this little girl. Such a steep (I mean steep) learning curve. A really amazing relationship we've built together. Throughout all the pain, sadness, fear, anger, frustration . . . I would do it 100 times over again for her.

I love watching her grow and learn; fall and get up, but there are times when I could take her back to her 8 lb 10 oz tiny newborn yumminess and snuggle her even more than I did. Appreciate those tiny, quiet moments just a little bit more. Smell her, hold her hand, cuddle her and kiss her.

But tomorrow, or rather in an hour or two, I get to nurse her and cuddle her in my bed. And then I get to wake up next to her, feel her crawl all over me and Jake, change her diaper.

I love being June's mom.

done with the MCAT forever

YAY, we are done with the MCAT FOREVER!!

Jake took the MCAT on September 1st and finally got his score back today, October 2nd!! They can send the scores in any time between 9 and 5 pm, so we first checked around 9:15 am and they were in! Jake did NOT want to look, he was so nervous. He kept setting his phone to the side and saying, "We are not looking. We're just gonna go throughout our day and not look!" Haha I was NOT having that.

Finally he agreed to look, pushed the button, and I think I was the first to see that his score. And it's SO GOOD and I'm seriously so, so, so happy. He really has worked so hard, especially this summer. Even while we were at the farm and he was studying and not playing with his brothers and us . . . that is truly amazing dedication. And now he has something to show for all of it!

We had a celebratory lunch at Chipotle haha and told all of our family that he did well. Everyone was so excited for him. We were also excited to start narrowing down which schools are in reach now and which ones we want to apply to. It's so exciting and scary all at the same time!

I'm so proud of Jake. He really is so hardworking and dedicated to school and his family! Now we just play and party until we start applying for schools!